Football Zing!s

I'm looking forward to watching Alabama and West Virginia face off this weekend with two starting quarterbacks who couldn't handle being a backup to Jameis.

Would it be politically correct to use "Cowboys and Indians" in reference to a certain football game this weekend? Or, no?

The good guys won. Nice job, Tallahassee voters.

Florida is first in unconstitutional elections, and I want my medal or trophy just for participating.

Hearing footsteps, Pons?

Three strikes and you're out, Steve.

Three strikes and you're out. Please do not run again!

Got the voters message, Steve?

Poor Steve -- he paid those back taxes for nothing!

It is really exciting to wake up and find out which liberals won the elections in Tallahassee.

If you didn't vote, you have no right to complain. You got what you voted for.

I stood on multiple corners of town to wave political signs, and both candidates won.

Once again Districts 8 and 9 will be without representation in the Florida House for two more years.

The new FAMU football fight song: Show us the money, show us the money!

Ask the NRA: Every 9-year-old needs Uzi lessons.

You need to be at least 60 before saying "back in the day."

The same drivers who run over me in the crosswalk stop all traffic for invasive, pooping, lazy, nonmigrating Canada geese.

If it is really medical marijuana, why is it not distributed through pharmacies?

Phew i stink! Does the antidote for being on the wrong end of a skunk work for voting in unconstitional election?

TPD. One bullet. Shirt pocket.

All the inbred ISIS terrorist look alike so they shouldn't have to wear the cowardly mask. But probably a good idea being they are all pretty much butt ugly camel lovers.

Maybe Jackie Pons' new slogan should be "Contractors First"!

I don't know which came first, the chicken or the egg. But I do know that the chickens and eggs alternate chronologically except when the natural order is disturbed by a frying pan.

If Dan markel was Danielle markel the police would have already identified the suspect and the media would be exploding with stories of a contentious divorce. Why the double standard

Ice bucket challenge? I'm challenging myself to donate $10 to Planned Parenthood for every dissenting email I receive in response to my letter to the editor. Maybe double for the especially rude and rambling ones. Keep 'em coming: Planned Parenthood will thank you!

21 schools will be selling alcohol this year at their stadiums for football games this year where there was no alcohol zone last year this was published in ESPN 4 days ago under the title schools that are strapped for cash that are not in the big 5 Fam...

Hats and helmets off to Auburn's Coach Malzahn for not allowing his starting quarterback to start the season opener due to a civil legal violation. How refreshing to see that character counts in college football.

You move to Canada, I move to McDonald's! Gotta love that $1.00 large iced coffee.

Jennifer and now, Carlos. What did you expect!

Let us minority conservatives hope that our new mayor is for all the people. that he is not planning to be a one side fits all activists mayor. and only occasional attend Republican get togethers for a free lunch.

Tallahassee is a wonderful city and has a lot to offer it's citizens? However, the politics in this town are ridiculous and backward. Will we never learn?

For those that still believe that it is about "Voter Suppression" and not removing some of the fraud from our voting process, you are just small minded, ill informed, uneducated, biased party follower or just one of the many sheeple that will believe whatever the leftist liberal media dictates to you. Sad either way.

Alas, all the King's lackeys and all the King's men couldn't get Ferguson to flame again.

The "smidgens of corruption" in Ms. Lerner's Blackberry were intentionally scrapped, exactly at the time she was summoned to Congress. Coincidence, of course.

Well, City elections are over, but one needs to ask: Was that permanent Stewart billboard on Mahan paid for by the sales taxes he never remitted?

You know, there's plenty of other places to live in our great City other than the campus side of town. You should try it; generally peaceful year round.

former disgraced Lt. Gov. Carroll is definitely a Democrat.

When Charlie Crist finally leaves this earth will he be a registered Democrat or a registered Republican.

Congratulations, Mayor-elect Gillum. Might I suggest, before the next time you're quoted on the front page of the paper, you learn the difference between "lay down" and "lie down."

Now that your Forrest has been chopped down, where will you hide your rubber stamp now, Mr. Pons?

Congrads to Gillum. Who is going to "guarantee a certain quality of life" - the government or the neighborhoods?

What's the problem? Scott ignored Carroll the same way Reagan ignored G.H.W. Bush. It's the Republican way!!

I don't know which came first, the chicken or the egg, but I know that the current stream of chickens and eggs alternate in time. Dadgummit! At least I know something!

Gov. Scott to Floridians: "No, I don't feel your pain"

former disgraced Lt. Gov. Carroll is another one of them cry baby losers. However her timing is perfect. Way to go Jennifer. Vote for Charlie.

Hurricane off the West Coast. Hurricane off the East Coast. Floods, fires, and pestilence in between.

Did anyone else with regular Comcast cable notice that CSS is gone from Channel 26? And did anyone else see their cable bill go down because of it? Comcast, should change their name to a dirty four letter word.

Now that Gillum did not have to spend the $253,151 in campaign contributions, i suggest he donate the money to the boys and girls club of tallahassee, the policeofficers and firefighters of tallahassee.

mr. new mayor. you odds of feeling safe in your neighborhood is much greater if you are living in a two parent household.

Gillum`s acceptance speech sounded like Obama`s hope and change acceptance speech. consensus builder, bringing the community together a leader.

Sorry, Mr. new Mayor, nobody is guaranteed anything. To think otherwise, is naive. I hope you are not naive.

Gillum gets 100% of the black only liberal only vote and 76% of the liberal only white vote. His he everybody`s mayor. i voted for him and i am a conservative.

My wife and I are political opposites; I'm a Democrat and she's confused.

In the days to come i will be submitting suggestions for our new cheerleader-in chief to submit to the 16 member gun violence committee.

will cheerleader Gillum be the man to head off any disturbances in the south side.

The staff at FSU Alumni Association takes time off to drive to a football game while in Admissions students stand in long lines to correct thousands of computer errors. The new myFSU/Student Central program is a disaster. Priorities?

The conversation goes like this, "Son, it's best if you only use that thing to pee because, no matter what actually happened, you're guilty of sexual assault."

Lucinda Williams and her band were awesome, especially when she thanked us for our appreciation. Let's hope she brings back Richard Thompson, Emmylou Harris, and Bonnie Raitt. Sheryl Crow wouldn't be bad either!

I don't guess they have red lights in Broward, Palm Beach, or Escambia counties. They seem to be in an awful hurry to get to ours.

We endorse Alva (BETH) Swafford Strippin, but we don't think she will WIN Your reverse psychology won -- but so did her STRONG Tallahassee roots. Go Lincoln! Go ALVA BETH!

I knew that all of this negative campaigning was going to keep people away from the polls.

I believe that this election proved Abe Lincoln right. "You can fool all the people some of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you can't fool all the people all the time"

Hummm. The Evening Rose and Governor's charter schools faculty members are charged with molestation and sexual communication with students. Why am I not surprised that our legislators support charter schools over public schools?

My wealthier friends drive $15,000 cars getting 30 mpg and my nearly poor friends drive $30,000 tanks getting 15 mph.

To the driver in the white Toyota Tundra on Mahan Dr. at 2 PM on Tuesday. Your rear window displayed your hatred for Obama, but you offered no alternatives or recommended changes. You sound just like the US House of Representatives. What do you stand FOR?

Merle, you got it right about contemporary country music - it has no substance. And no soul.

If you move from low-ranking Florida to a high-ranking state, why in the world would you want your child to be able to step right in and be on the same level of learning? Why not accept improvement if it's available?

Lauren Bacall a true and honorable lady dies and is skipped over by the press. But Robin Williams a drug abuser and depressed person gets all the glory. What is wrong with our country?

What is it about the "Parking for Hybrid Vehicle Only sign" that I don't understand? For starters, why does it exist? Eco minded, elitist hybrid owners should park across the lot and enjoy the free exercise walking in.

Tiger Woods parts with his swing coach. He's keeping his Salsa coach, Fox trot coach and Tango coach

If you work for the city you should live in the city. Reap what you sow.

I always wondered what Jennifer Carroll was doing in her house on Rich Farm Rd. when the body guard would back in the garage and close the door.

Just to keep my run going, I voted. That is to say, I turned in a blank ballot. Wonder if it's still blank?

Went to the beach again today. The water had risen well above the sand bars. Global warming must be real.

Political "race cards" don't come in decks of 52, they come in reams of 500. Proctor buys by the case.

Al Sharpton should be in a museum.

So, Governor Scott wants to evaluate the new education standards? Didn't he approve them just last year?

If President Reagan's admonition that "the government is the enemy" is simplistic and misguided, then does that mean that we should believe that "the government" is our friend?

Gwen Graham would keep Obamacare and perhaps reform it. Southerland would kill it and get more customers at his funeral home.

Interesting to see an old lady in the Republican tv ad railing against Obamacare - like she isn't on Medicare?

Just imagine how good our health care system could be if Republicans put their energy into improving hated Obamacare instead of trying to kill it with no alternative.

Bush 43 had the respect or at least the fear of our nation throughout the world, Obama make us look like a clown car. Or is that Club Car?

It's not the length of the vacations that a president takes, it is the timing of when they take it. Which is probably best that Obama stay on vacation until 2016.

Remind me again how hybrid vehicles are NOT defined in City Code, and then tell me again how to park!

In another "unprecedented" achievement, Obama has maintained a food stamp (SNAP) enrollment in excess of 45 million Americans - well, not necessarily US Americans - for three years running. Well done, Welfare State!

Over 500 jobs at CNN and HLN about to disappear. That's a good start.

ISIS, the Islamic State, controls a Syrian air force base. The next question is whether Obama will provide them military transports or fly them to the US commercially.

If, as US Rep Pat Murphy (Dim-IA) said, illegal immigrants aren't given a "pathway for citizenship" they could become terrorists, then they should be rounded up and expelled now, before they become terrorists, Dims or other threats to America.

Burger King moving to Canada to escape Obama's tax oppression. Good, sound economic move! Now if only they would improve counter service and cut the yelling back and forth by the crew.

A driver running a red light resulting in death: $250. A felon recruited and voting before his/her rights restored: $4,000 fine. Voter suppression: priceless.

Feds are spending your tax $$$ to monitor Twitter for "hate speech" and "misinformation" and "false and misleading ideas," such as people thinking their speech is free and protected. Consequences to be announced.

FBI and DHS warn attacking ISIS may provoke them against the US. Uh, fellas, with ISIS promising to drown us in our own blood and murdering men, women and kids wholesale, I'd say they were already provoked. Duh!

The paid liars get more brazen with each new press secretary appointment. Just when you think nobody could top Jay Carney, along comes Josh Earnest.